Last weekend at an event, a stranger walked by my booth, reached into his pocket, and handed me a beautiful, crocheted heart on a string with a note attached. The event was quite busy, so I couldn’t look at it right away. Once things settled down, I took a moment to read it more closely.
On one side, it said:
🖤 Take me!
After every dark night,
there is a brighter day.
#PeytonHeartProject
On the other side, it said:
You found a heart!
It’s yours to keep!
You are beautiful. Pass it on.
Please take a photo of your heart and pin it on our map at www.The PeytonHeartProject.org.
Below, there were Instagram and Facebook handles, a website, and an email address.
I could tell it was going to be a sad story. This is what I read:
The Peyton Heart Project
The Peyton Heart Project was created in June of 2015 after being inspired by several stories including that of a 13-year-old boy named Peyton James who died by suicide in 2014.
During Peyton’s young life he had experienced a tremendous amount of bullying by his peers. Many of us know far too well what the negative effects of bullying are on a child and how difficult it can be to believe that it will ever get better. Far too often bullying leads to depression, anxiety, and other mental health issues. Sometimes these issues can increase the likelihood of suicide.
The delicate hearts, each one made by hand and each one representing the delicate heart of a life lost to suicide, have various inspiring quotes attached to them, along with our social media information. The hearts are placed in public places around the world for people to find during their everyday lives. We hope the hearts cause people to stop for a moment and reflect on a life lost to suicide, on bullying and on the fact that everyone’s life matters. We want to leave people with a feeling that there is still good out there in the world and we would like to inspire others to join us on this mission of kindness.
Peyton James was a 13-year-old middle school student from Georgetown, Texas.
The stranger who gave me the crocheted heart was David James, the father of Peyton James.
I took a photo of my crocheted heart, pinned it on the map, and reached out to David. We met at a coffee shop, where he gave me 100 crocheted hearts.
Spreading the word, one heart at a time
Now, with every My Friends and I book order, we’ll include a heart that can be used as a bookmark, to help raise awareness about suicide, bullying, and breaking the stigma around mental health.
For an even greater impact, consider ordering additional crocheted hearts on The Peyton Heart Project website. Each time you pass the book to a friend, use a heart to mark the pages you want them to fill out, and let them know the heart is theirs to keep.
Plus, invite kids who are being bullied, to sign your My Friends and I book to show them that you care and that they have a friend and ally in you.
In addition, now through the end of the year, we’ll donate 20% of each book sold using the promo code HEARTS to The Peyton Heart Project.
Help us support The Peyton Heart Project and get a My Friends and I book now. Make sure to enter the promo code HEARTS at checkout.
If your child is being bullied
… talk to them.
Listen to David's interview, where he shares the story of losing his son to suicide and the journey that followed.
One thing he said that stayed with me was: "Most people who take their own lives don't want to die. But they don't know any other way. They just want the pain to go away."
When asked about warning signs and what parents can do if they suspect that their child might be contemplating suicide, David said, “If you see changes in your child's daily routine or their behavior, talk to them. Be blunt, ask them, ‘Are you thinking about suicide, are you thinking about killing yourself?’ It’s very hard for someone to say, ‘Yes, I want to kill myself.’ But, if you open that conversation and you allow them to, that can make such a world of difference, because they realize that you care.”
If your child is the bully
… talk to them.
If you learn that your child is bullying others, start by calmly talking with them to understand what’s behind this behavior. Approach the conversation without judgment to create a safe space for honesty. Ask questions to uncover any unmet emotional needs, self-esteem issues, or social pressures they might be feeling. Encourage them to think about how their actions affect others and discuss kinder ways to handle tough social situations.
Work with their teachers or counselors to set up a support plan. Consistent consequences, participation in programs for emotional regulation, and engaging in positive activities can help redirect their behavior. By addressing the root causes and encouraging empathy, you can guide your child toward building respectful, healthy relationships.